Why I’ve Spent $40,000 on Therapy and Don’t Regret It At All

It’s true. I’ve spent at least $40,000 on therapy. Next to my house, my emotional wellness is the most expensive thing I own. And that’s been largely without insurance, on a modest income. Therapy has been a priority for me for a long time—but it hasn’t always been smooth sailing.

I’ve had awful therapists. I’ve outgrown others. And, probably the hardest part of it all, I’ve had great therapists who called me out on my own BS and helped me discover my story. But here’s the thing: I don’t regret a penny of it.

1. Even When It's Bad, I Learn Something About Myself

There’s value in every therapy session, even the bad ones. For example, I once had a therapist who literally told me not to work or go to school while my kids were at home. (Yes, really.) And, while that was unhelpful advice, it did teach me something important about myself: I believe deeply in showing my kids that it’s possible to do hard things, even when life is chaotic.

2. Therapy Taught Me How to Be Vulnerable in Safe Spaces

Vulnerability is kind of my thing. I built my first major blog on the themes of vulnerable motherhood and imperfect homemaking (wink). But here’s the thing: I used to be vulnerable with everyone, all the time, with zero filter. Therapy helped me figure out what vulnerability in a safe space feels like. I learned that there are times and places for openness, and there are boundaries that need to be respected—not just by others, but by me too.

3. My Mental Health Is Worth the Investment

I live with several chronic mental illnesses, and if those were physical ailments, no one would think twice about investing in treatment. And yet, somehow, when it comes to mental health, there's still hesitation. Therapy is life-saving treatment for me—it’s a chronic, incurable illness, and just like any health issue, it deserves priority. For me, the investment is worth it every single time.

4. Because F&*% Stigma

There’s still a stigma attached to going to therapy. We’ve all heard statements like, “You need professional help,” thrown around as if it were an insult. But here’s the truth: At some point in our lives, I believe everyone could benefit from professional help. I’m proud of how far I’ve come, and I feel no shame for the therapy sessions I’ve attended. In fact, I wear it as a badge of honor.

5. Therapy is Radical Self-Care

Therapy is part of my holistic approach to self-care. Self care isn’t just pampering and rest (but those things definitely count!), it’s also about doing the hard work—growing, changing, and confronting the things that weigh us down.

6. Therapy Has Taught Me About My Own Resilience

I am resilient as hell (pardon the language). I know some people are not fans of the word "resilience," but I’m owning it. Therapy has taught me that I can withstand much more than I ever thought possible. Learning to cope with trauma, setting boundaries, and building a solid sense of self-worth have made me stronger. And each time I show up to therapy, I’m reminded of the strength it took to get me there in the first place. The fact that I’ve made it this far—through the storm of life and still showing up—proves just how resilient I am.

Why Therapy Is a Non-Negotiable for Me

At this point in my life, therapy is a non-negotiable. It’s a cornerstone of my mental and emotional well-being, and my family knows it’s a priority. Therapy helps me maintain balance, find peace, and stay grounded, even during the hardest days.

I want to acknowledge my privilege. While money has always been tight, we’ve always been able to arrange a payment situation that worked with our budget. I know therapy isn’t available to everyone, and that’s a darned shame.

Sure, the toll of therapy—both physical and emotional—is high, and the stigma is real, but those things are worth fighting. I’ve spent $40,000 on therapy, and I’m proud of it. It’s not just an expense; it’s an investment in myself—and that, my friend, is worth it.